It is February 2011, while I was thinking what I'm going to write home here in the next post. Today, a friend and a roommate, rent our beautiful metaphor for the question "what is transsexualism, which you were called into the last few days have been. You can think of transsexualism as a constant traveler (s), it does not have a home, you are constantly on the journey and lives of "suitcases", press again the places where you live, until you eventually reach a "place "is where you feel comfortable and feel at home and can develop themselves. I found this very fitting metaphor for my current Situation, I need space, space to unfold around me and find. So I have decided to leave our flat and move to a flat. A WG is social great, the friendship between us is very big, but space for personal enrichment, for personal retreat, not just exist. My room 10 sq.m. respectively. now there is an extended wardrobe, gives me the non-development opportunity that I need in order to find myself.
The new "Sally" home is now rich 74qm, consisting of 2 rooms and a great Logia, as the whole top floor apartment with high ceilings and great windows facing the back Logia. I have in terms of finding accommodation some have to learn, after all, this is my first apartment that I seek. So far, my family and I have lived in a great house with a very large garden. So I've
must quickly learn a lot, for example how big are really 50sqm? How do I apply? as a man? or a woman? as I step on the tour?
Now these issues have moved me again and again through the head and then I made the decision myself as a "man" to advertise and to deny a woman a visit.
The first real estate agent told me at my apartment search that 50-100 candidate in the Stuttgart come to 2-3 room apartments. Now through the application as a "man" got my chance not insignificant. If I'm with the brokers to come to an appointment for the home visit, I then described my situation openly and honestly ... "I'm transsexual and on the way from man to woman ..." ... most agents had no problem, on the contrary, I found it very interesting how open all dealt with this statement are. Overall, I had
six viewings, I have perceived as a woman. Even if the homes did not meet my idea for this was the conversations with the people more interesting. Most were encouraging me and confirmed me as a woman.
My desire to live, I got even on the basis of my "story". The Broker has been used by my landlord for me and which I found particularly great. In the meantime we have got to know us and I am also open, sympathetic people made. Sometimes I think
that our society is not as closed as it seems often. I showed the situation that you can reach people with openness and honesty. If then the appearance of "natural" and nothing is shown, most probably have no problem with the subject of transsexualism.
Thus, a flat must be established, it should be a place where I feel at home and also woh my guests and my family will come visit me at home as well . Feel Thanks to my wife we have now all together furnishings, you made great efforts in the matter and supported me. Alone, I would have failed because at the moment my "sites" very large and very numerous .. new position in the company, preparing for the integration of my person in the company, advancing the name change, stress in everyday working life, every week, a psychotherapist, the constant change of outward appearances (man, woman) and then find accommodation .... and then there's the family not to come too briefly in the entire history and have always been very much do without me, especially my partner, and finally 'm still myself ... I felt that I really did for me no more time.
So I can not thank enough the support of my wife with respect to establishment, organization of as many small parts, showed me once again how strong my situation wife for 30 years I have at my side. I know for treasures of a lot, because ultimately it will probably be a bit far your second home.
Have you schonmal a budget based on the principles re? It is amazing what you get used to the course of life in living standards and would give up nothing.
The subject of integration is very broad, on the way to my perceived sex I have to integrate themselves and also in the public and professional life.
Our legislators see it everyday in front of a 24-month test in which we transsexual in the sex felt in everyday life we are to integrate. What indeed makes sense in my view, but not nearly so simple. The majority of our daily life is usually in work, just what then does the job as a woman to perform as such. The prescription hormones, and a few things like Eppilation should help to overcome this.
I had made my professional outing in August 2010 for my employer. Fortunately, I work a gender-neutral industry, I know some acquaintances who work in a pure Männderdomäne in which such an outing may well mean a professional suicide.
side now and the time of my outings, I was often asked by when we (my management) because they may announce something or can ... At that time I had a time horizon of 8-12 months was adopted. However, this turned out to be a miscalculation. By the hormones in the body changes, the consciousness is "marked" ... I let my course, I ... The more I allow the more there is the unwillingness to why I have to hide anymore. In heart I wish tomorrow as women's work . Go But! There are a lot of points to note, there is the matter with your face and the make-up .. the more gray areas of the face are to be applied more thicker. This problem you get with Eppilationen under control and is therefore controlled and predictable.
The hormones, however, are not to influence, depending on the body feature, the body develops faster or slower, the Inner I is not influenced, the constant back of the actual, perceived natural ICH's only brings back stress and the old familiar inner conflict only much more intense.
Then there's the question of the proper organizational integration, as this is to run it?
Should I have to write an email .. ... and tomorrow will be the new Mrs Sally Sarah, Mr xxx is therefore to forget? ... Hardly. So you have to create a strategy and this deal must be well thought through. First, I informed the management about me and then informed sukszesive some colleagues first what is wrong with me. Mostly I traff amazement but also interest, understanding and support. However, I soon realize that this is indeed still a "man" told in your eyes. In order to truly work as a woman in the company may also still in an exposed position, you have to make a lot of thoughts in the form of "what if"? ....
I chose the individuals personally meet a woman outside of working hours on neutral ground and you and me therefore to give a chance to "sniff" is, so I've had the past few weeks a lot of meetings. Usually I have the next day to pick up the personal Feedb ack. I previously had very positive feedback on it, but also critical thinking, for a meeting in the Arts is far from being a working day. Some of the people had before the meeting, fear, fear because no one could imagine how I as a woman "over" come, it is placed? ... or at least a "man in drag." I have naturally been at the meetings and should be most concerned there was then a very pleasant evening the most would like to repeat. The feedback from colleagues to take on every case to heart, because you have to work with you in the new Gechlechtsrolle together.
It is very important that the company builds up a social base and holds. Therefore, the process requires too much time and much energy. After 2 weeks of these dates I am now at a point where I want to have at the moment only my rest. But the effort is worth it, because only in this complicated way I can I gently forward buttons and the people who surrounded me integrate into my world and vice versa.
But it's me aware that this is just the beginning, there are so many points which I consider to be as a woman can go to work.
also must not forget the integration of itself and is still the most important.
So I look the whole thing now expect much excitement and confidence and see my own integration as a piece of "adventure".
because it will give me throughout my path more clear that the life of every person is unique and is worthy to be lived. So I enjoy this I my natural when it is connected with many losses and changes
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